Using Craigslist personals and AFF: a quick guide

how to be a playerThe free, classifieds (or personals, as the Americans know them) ad website Craigslist offers everything from second-hand water filters to no strings sex with strangers.

Unsurprisingly, the Casual Encounters section of the Craigslist personals is a vast, seething pit of horny, mainly deeply illiterate (and sometimes dangerous) men, all trying to score with the much smaller pool of women on the site.

However, unlike AFF, where being a regular guy can sometimes make you feel like a tiny fish in a pool populated by many good-looking male sharks, on CL it’s potentially the key to riches. This is because a lot of the women who look at the Casual Encounters section will be looking for men just like that.

But it’s a totally unregulated and potentially very dangerous area for women, however, and we do not recommend it. It can be an effective way to find some overnight fun but be aware of the obvious risks of meeting strangers who a) only have sex on their minds and b) may be totally untraceable due to the fact they won’t even have given the Craigslist personals section any credit card details.

Believe it or not, NSA sex is alive and well on the regular sites like, too. Again, this is advice more for the men as any women seeking casual sex can sound flirtatious in their profile and then hopefully just be very picky about who they reply to.

The tip for the chaps is to rise above the herd, ie the mass of inarticulate, cheapo males who can only manage to write: “My namez daryl ur cute hit me up xxx” and offer women a fantastic time with a guy who’s great company (you).

Okay, this is all you need to remember:

Any mention of sex in a regular dating profile is seduction dynamite.

You see, even though men are supposedly always thinking about sex, most don’t mention it in their profiles (apart from the sleazy Darryls, who obviously do it so badly that no one gives them a second look). It seems a bit inappropriate, doesn’t it?

Besides, someone you know from work might be reading and… it just feels wrong. But it’s not – it’s very, very right. If you’re up for some no-strings sex, put it! Trust us – just drop “mind-blowing sex” in a list of stuff you like and see what happens. It’s like a red rag to a bull.

Karl, 30, says: “The number of women who are up for casual sex on the big sites like Match and even Guardian Soulmates is surprisingly high. It wasn’t like this eight years ago, I don’t think. As an experiment I made some joke at the end of the profile saying oh, and I’m up for some great sex, too.

“And I added: ‘It’s okay, I’m not embarrassed – no one reads to the end of profiles.’ You wouldn’t believe how many women wrote to me with some message, and ended it with, ‘Oh, and by the way, I read to the end.’

“It’s such an easy way for them to say: ‘I might be up for being seduced.’ It won’t always mean they’re up for a one night stand, of course. But it definitely means they’re quite a highly sexed person, in my experience. I’ve got laid much more from Soulmates and dating direct than the Craigslist personals or AFF. And the women are obviously much nicer, too.”

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